


What We Do In Styria: The Biannual Vampire Orgy

by BakedTofu



Category: Castlevania (Cartoon), What We Do in the Shadows (TV), 悪魔城ドラキュラ | Castlevania Series
Genre: Alucard cries a lot, Alucard is beautiful, Carefully worded Anne Rice refrences to avoid her wrath and lawyers, Dark Comedy, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, F/F, F/M, JoJo References, Konami is the real villian, M/M, Misandry, Multi, Orgy, Pegging, Playing fetch with dildos, Stands (JoJo), Teratophilia, Trevor and Sypha dolls, Voyeurism, alucard is a real slut in this, background carmilla/alucard, background lenore/hector/alucard, drug blood, laszlo's hat, monster fucking, no one is straight, the infinite corridor, things get meta, virgin blood
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:00:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 16,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24921187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BakedTofu/pseuds/BakedTofu
Summary: This started out as a crack/comedy fic, but now it's pretty much that and my own personal (joke) season 3 continuation. All plot lines will converge!!!It's Styria's turn to host the next biannual vampire orgy. The ruling quartet plans on using everything they have at their disposal to ensure this orgy is legendary and talked about for ages. Meanwhile, on the other side of the Atlantic, some vampires in Staten Island receive an invitation. Will this orgy be a success? Or will Laszlo's stupid cursed hat ruin the whole thing?*More Castlevania Netflix heavy than What We Do In The Shadows heavy.
Relationships: Alucard | Adrian Tepes | Arikado Genya/Trevor Belmont/Sypha Belnades, Guillermo de la Cruz/Nandor the Relentless, Hector/Lenore (Castlevania), Morana/Striga (Castlevania)
Comments: 36
Kudos: 45





	1. The Planning

**Author's Note:**

> When I started watching What We Do in The Shadows I kept thinking about what Carmilla and sisters would be doing if put in the same situations (with Hector as the familiar, obviously), then I saw the orgy episode and got this idea. It'll be a few chapters at least before the crossover starts.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ruling quartet learns they're hosting the next biannual vampire orgy and discusses how they can significantly improve upon the usual vampire orgy.

The ruling quartet sat around their table, going over business and news of the week. After they’d finished talking about their plans to subjugate humanity and the progress of their army of night creatures and mercenaries, a more banal topic came up. 

“I do have one other piece of news sisters,” Lenore said, holding an opened letter, “I’ve gotten word that the responsibility of hosting the next biannual vampire orgy has fallen on us.” 

Morana rolled her eyes and groaned, Striga looked annoyed, Carmilla sighed. 

“That damn thing again?” Carmilla complained, “When we’ve finally subjugated humanity and the rest of vampire kind is groveling at our feet we can abolish it.” 

“Carmilla,” Morana said, “we don’t need to abolish it. Consider, why are the orgies always so terrible?” 

“Because idiot vampire man children and animals are always running the show.” 

“Exactly,” she agreed, “but what if  _ we _ had an orgy and only invited women? That would solve most of the problems.”

“This is why I married her.” Striga said with a smile.    
  
“The men can have their own orgy,” Carmilla spoke, “and we’ll have ours. The men will be happy anyway because they’re too stupid to know the difference, and the women will all appreciate the difference… let’s make it happen.” 

“While that’s all good, and  _ mostly _ true,” Lenore spoke, “we should use this opportunity of hosting this orgy for diplomacy and networking. With everything in chaos securing allies is important.” 

“I dislike it, but our sister is right.” Striga had to agree with her, “It also serves as a good morale boost for the army.” 

“We must do everything in our power to ensure our orgy is talked about for ages. Is there anything special or unique you’d like to include? And are there any foreseeable problems that can be solved in advance?” 

The sisters took turns chiming in with different concerns and things they’d like to do. Carmilla brought up the annoyance of finding virgins somewhere besides an orphanage. While children were easy enough to abduct and throw around, they made the most irritating noises before they were killed. If they wanted to have a more enjoyable feast, they’d need older virgins, with more blood, that didn’t make the godawful noises human children made. Kills were more difficult to savor when they were so annoying. It’s also not like they could simply harvest the blood in advance, the orgies always needed to have live kills or people would be unhappy. Lenore didn’t quite know how that could be resolved, and suggested Hector be brought in for consultation. He might have some insight, being a human and all. Her sisters figured asking him couldn’t hurt. 

“Hector!” Lenore called out sweetly. He had been sitting in his designated corner, like he usually did for meetings. He was only allowed at the table, and only allowed to speak when called upon, “Do you know where we can find some adult virgins, preferably male and not scrawny?” 

Hector sighed, got up from his little seat, respectfully walked over to the table, bowed, and answered, “I know of one class of magicians that believes if they remain a virgin until 30 they’ll develop new powers.” 

“Where can they be found?” Morana asked. 

“I don’t know. Humanity shunned me, remember?” he passively joked. 

Lenore narrowed her eyes at him, wordlessly telling him to watch his attitude. Hector sighed. 

“It’s a starting point.” Striga said.   
  
“And we’ll have to follow up on that,” Lenore said as she made some notes,”now onto the next suggestion… anyone?” 

“A way to make the event women only without making it women only.” Morana said. 

“Hmm... “ Lenore thought, “What about designated sapphic rooms? Of course we’d also make a gay room. The rest of the rooms would be bisexual. But bisexuals are free to wander about rooms that allow their respective genders.” 

“You think the drunken male bastards are going to respect that?” Carmilla questioned, “Most of them are too stupid to even know the difference.” 

“I’ll see if one of our magicians can construct a barrier.” 

(A/N: Clarification that the magic barriers are not transphobic, and that there are no TERFs in this story. The vampire magician isn’t J.K. Rowling ) 

“That would be perfect.” Morana said, “Why didn’t we think of this sooner?!” 

“Now that that’s settled, let’s move on to the next suggestion.” 

“... umm” Hector raised his hand, “Permission to ask a question?” 

“Seriously?” Carmilla said in annoyance. 

“Yes, Hector?” Lenore responded. 

“You mentioned gay, lesbian, and bisexual rooms… do you have no need of straight rooms?” Hector asked. Morana and Striga burst out laughing. 

“Idiot!” Carmilla scoffed. 

“Now Carmilla,” Lenore said over her sisters’ laughter, “I told you, I’m teaching him vampire culture. We need to be patient and tolerant with his questions.” Then she looked over to Hector and answered his question seriously and without judgement, how a Jojo character might, “There aren’t any straight vampires.”

Morana and Striga laughed harder. 

“Thank you.” Hector felt like an idiot for asking. He’d seen enough of Dracula’s war council and probably should have figured that out on his own. Morana and Striga began to recover from their laughter. 

“Back to business, any other ideas or suggestions? Personally I was wondering if we should consider inviting Dracula’s son.”   


“Why?” Striga asked. 

“As we all know, before Dracula became a recluse, took a pet, and went insane, there were stories of how magnificent his cock was, and of him being an excellent lover. I know inviting a dhampir would be unusual… but it’s possible he’s inherited some of his father’s dick.” 

“Ugh, no,” Carmilla said, “his mixed breed son is practically still an infant. He’s against killing humans because his pet breeder mother wouldn’t like it or some bullshit. He’ll kill the entire mood.” 

“What if we don’t invite him but tell everyone we did?” Striga suggested. 

“That will create excitement but it also creates the risk of talk reaching the boy,” Morana said, “and then he might decide to show up anyway.” 

“That’s a fair point, but as far as I know no one has even met the boy. And knowing what his father was like growing up he probably doesn’t even know about this aspect of our culture. I think inviting him is the right thing to do.” Lenore said. 

“Thinking of making yourself a menagerie are you?” Carmilla asked. 

“No!” Lenore exclaimed, “Although…” she began thinking, “Hector might like having a friend to play with when I’m not around.” 

Hector sighed.

“Do you get lonely?” Lenore asked. 

“I’m fine, thank you.”    
  
“Jealous Mommy might give her attention to someone else, baby?” 

Hector sighed. 

“Stop.” Carmilla said though an angry sigh. This wasn’t the first time Lenore tried to get away with that kind of talk in  _ their _ room. 

“How about this,” Morana said, “the two of you use our mirror to see if his equipment is remarkable enough to invite.” 

“Fine.” 

“You’re a genius.” Striga added. 

“I agree that’s fair.” Lenore said and took a few notes, “Carmilla and I will schedule a time to check out Adrian’s dick. Other suggestions?”

There was silence for a few moments. Then Carmilla smiled. Everyone knew what that smile meant by now. 

“I just got an idea.” Carmilla proclaimed. “Slave boy,” she addressed Hector, “are you capable of determining the shape and attributes of the night creatures you forge?” 

“To some extent, what do you mean exactly?”

“Can you make me a night creature, all tits and clits? And another one, covered in cocks of varying lengths and girths? And a third that’s some combination of the two?” 

“Now that,” Striga said, “is a really good idea. Also, make one with thighs like mine, except larger. Everyone is always begging to be crushed by my thighs; they'll love it!” 

Hector froze for a moment. He didn’t want to admit he had experience...  _ experimenting _ with night creatures in his past but was unsure if he could forge one’s to the sisters’ exact specifications. 

“I can forge good thighs. I’m not sure about the rest but I’ll see what I can do,” he replied. 

“Yes!!” Lenore beamed, “We’ll get started on that as soon as the meeting is over! I assure you Hector and I will test out his fuck creatures personally to make sure they are up to standard.”

Hector sighed. 

“I did not need to know.” Morana said. 

“I’m not even going to try and figure out what’s wrong with you anymore.” Carmilla said and took a sip of blood, “Just make sure they’re impressive.” 

After that exchange the sisters spent some time talking about minor details. What they could all agree on is that there would be order, within reason. They’d demonstrate their ability to lead by having a well run, organized orgy, it would stand out from the usual chaotic shitshows and be so impressive it would be talked about for centuries. 

Then they settled on what role each would be tasked with. Lenore would be responsible for determining the guest list and helping Hector forge the best fuck creatures the world had ever seen, Morana would be responsible for room arrangements and preparations, Striga would track down the virgin wizards Hector spoke of, Carmilla would act as the host the day of the event, and Hector would manage the familiar room (he was told familiar was how other vampires referred to their pets). After that all was decided the sisters went off on their separate ways, satisfied with their plans to throw a most legendary orgy. 


	2. The Preparations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The necessary preparations to set the plan into motion are made. Adrian's equipment is assessed, supplies are ordered, adult virgins are acquired, and fuck creatures are forged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story takes place in both 1476 and 2020, don’t ask me how. More years might be added later if I need to throw more characters into this thing. 

Hector had more questions for Lenore, and he managed to ask them as they walked together to his workshop. 

“What exactly does running the familiar room involve?” 

“It’s a place for familiars to wait while their masters are socializing. You should stock it with snacks for yourselves, and other things familiars might need to run to their masters with when called upon. Towels, lube, extra dildos, those blood caprisuns everyone likes, extra restraints, those sort of things.” 

“I see…” Hector wasn’t looking forward to interacting with other humans, but he was thankful Lenore said nothing that would imply they’d be taking part in their own human orgy or some other sort of depravity. He had enough depravity in his life already thanks to Lenore. 

When they reached the forge, Cezar ran over to greet Hector. He was in the body of a wolf pup now, however. Hector gave him a few pets on the head before he ran over to Lenore, who picked him up and sat with him on her lap. A body was already laid out on a table. Hector picked up his hammer and walked over to it. “I’ll start with the one Striga requested.. I know I can do that much. I didn’t want to say anything earlier because of how your sisters treat me but I have… had  _ relations _ … with my creatures… in the past.” 

“I know.” Lenore said bluntly and she pet Cezar. 

“What?! How could you-” 

“A man shunned by his own kind, with the ability to forge night creatures, that’s somehow fairly good at sex the first time  _ I _ take him for a ride? It was either night creatures or corpses.” 

Hector furrowed his brows and he felt his face heat up. “No...” 

“Yes,” she exclaimed as she placed Cezar on the ground, “And you really need not worry about anyone judging you for that sort of thing here. Immortality can get boring, most vampires will fuck practically anything once.” 

Hector nervously laughed to himself. 

“My sisters may have poked fun at you but they wouldn’t think any less of you for it,” she said sincerely, “We aren’t humans.”

“That’s because they already think nothing of me.” 

“My point still stands.” 

Hector sighed. “Anyway, before I start, I’ve come to realize from being in the position that I am that if my creatures had a choice, they might not choose to participate in what is essentially sex slavery-” 

“Hector,” Lenore interrupted him, “we’ve had this conversation already. I haven’t made you do anything you truly didn’t want to do. If you ever want to enjoy your life you’re going to have to get over our relationship being entirely on my terms.” 

Hector placed his hammer on the table and put his hands up, “I’d only like to ask them if they’re willing to participate.” 

“Very well. But Hector, these creatures are bound to your intent, you already decide what they want to do when forging them. Asking them seems irrelevant, they just do what you want.” 

Hector lowered his arms. “Thank you. I still feel better giving them the courtesy of asking.” he raised up his hammer only for Lenore to interrupt him one more time. 

“Aren’t we forgetting something?” 

Hector stood hammer still in the air, said nothing, and looked over at Lenore. 

She bit her lip, then seductively smiled. 

Hector sighed, then put his hammer down again and furrowed his brows. In a swift motion his shirt was off and thrown on the ground in annoyance. 

“Good boy.” 

“Thank you,” he averted his gaze, “can I do my work uninterrupted now?” 

“Carry on.” 

The blue light that surrounded Hector when he began to forge made his abs look otherworldly. She always had him take his shirt off when she watched him forge for this reason. She continued to look on in curiosity and excitement as the human corpse that laid on the table morphed into a creature with slender talons, beautifully massive thighs, and an ass that could only have been drawn by Samuel Deats. It sat up and looked around the room in confusion. Hector gently walked over to the newly forged creature, gently placed his hand on their face and kindly spoke “There, there, it’s alright. I know it must feel strange to be back again.” 

The creature turned and looked at Hector, still visibly confused. 

“You may notice you have a particularly thicc pair of thighs, would you be willing to put them to use at a vampire orgy?” 

* * *

Morana stood in the magicians’ apothecary with a list of items she needed. Two magicians, the old man with the strange twitch, and an older man that didn’t look a day older than 18, stood before her, ready to meet her requests. 

“It is Styria’s turn to host the biannual orgy. Your lives hang on not fucking this up,” she glared at the old man. Morana was still bitter about the disrespect he showed her wife’s armor not too long ago, “I need you to have the following ready for me by the end of the week: at least 500 semen-proofing spells,” Morana was not playing around with this one, “enough for every room in the castle and then some. And at least that many condoms.” Vampires didn’t have to worry about STDs, but condoms made cleanup easier for those who cared about it. 

“Easily done.” the younger looking magician said. 

“At least 500 viagra, 60 liters of that lube that guarantees women orgasm but makes men feel nothing, 40 liters of regular lube.” 

“I believe that’s already in stock,” the old man said. 

“5 barriers that only allow women entry, 5 barriers that only allow men, as well as myself and my wife entry should it become necessary,” this was a safety measure that had to be taken. There was no way they’d let two gay orgy rooms go about unchecked. Morana found the thought of entering either room repulsive, but would do so if necessary. 

“Gladly done!” said the younger looking one, “And if you will allow me to say, every orgy should have them.” 

“Exactly, why should we be in the presence of genders we don’t want to fuck?” 

“Thank you!” 

“Next we need some form of cannabis, or alcohol. Some human drug we can give to the virgin(s) to get everyone really fucked up after we feed.” 

“You’re a genius.” 

“I know.”

* * *

The two bisexuals of the quartet had pulled up seats in front of their remote viewing mirror, ready to take on the task of seeing if Adrian Tepes had a dick worth inviting to the orgy. Lenore activated it, and they were shown a view of the outside of Dracula’s castle. 

“I guess that’s where the damn place ended up.” Carmilla said, “Looks like he’s picked up his father’s old decorating techniques. Perhaps this boy does know how to have a good time.” 

“But where is the boy…” Lenore said, squinting at the mirror, before waving her hand and refocusing her intent on being shown Adrian. The view in the mirror shifted to Adrian in his garden. Hair glistening in the sunlight, like an angel reaching out to pluck the strings on a harp, he collected berries. 

“Oh my, he’s pretty.” Lenore stated. “I want to fuck him. We’re inviting him.” 

“But we haven’t seen his dick yet,” Carmilla said, resting her chin on her hand, “It’ll probably be ages before this one whips it out.” 

“I don’t care about his dick,” Lenore leaned in closer to the mirror, “I want to peg that boy.” 

“Lenore-” Carmilla began to whine, then noticed a change in Adrian’s behavior. He fell to his knees, buried his face in his hands, his golden hair flowing down over his countenance like the water that ran from his eyes, “Wait.. oh  _ fuck no _ , is he  _ crying _ ?”

“Yes.” Lenore said and bit her lip.

“Oh no. We do not need  _ that _ killing the mood at our orgy.” 

“Plenty of us like it when our lovers cry during sex you know.” 

Carmilla rolled her eyes. “I know that type. He’s going to want you to be his mother and his therapist and be an entirely selfish do-me bottom in bed.” 

“You don’t know that! Maybe he deals with his issues by being overly eager to please! And even if he doesn’t, that’s the entire point of training!” 

Carmilla sighed. “I don’t think he’s going to whip his dick out anytime soon. And I have better things to do. Like testing out one of those fuck creatures running around with my three boys.” she stood up, “I’m leaving, call me over when we can check out his dick.” 

The mirror currently showed Alucard continuing to cry, but now he had collapsed onto the ground into the fetal position. 

“Carmilla!” Lenore whined, but Carmilla had already left, “Seriously?” she paused for a minute before calling out for Hector to get in here as fast as possible. In a few minutes he arrived, “You really need to do better than to keep me waiting like this.” 

“I doing the other work you gave me to do-” 

“Anyway,” Lenore brushed off his excuses and ignored their validity, “I need you to keep your eye on this mirror, when that pretty boy eventually whips his dick out, call me over. I need to assess it.” 

Why’d she have to be so damn unreasonable at times? How the hell was she expecting him to both be on dick watch and forge fuck creatures? But then Hector looked over to the mirror. He saw Alucard, crying, on the ground, in the fetal position, looking impossibly beautiful. In fact, this view, and the way the mirror framed it, was a masterpiece in its own right. The golden ratio spiral could have been perfectly laid over it. “Oh my, he’s-”

“Gorgeous,” she sighed looking back at the mirror, “I know.” she raised a hand to her face and ran her fingers over her lips, “On second thought I think I should stay and we should sit on dick watch together.” 

Hector was going to say he looked like he was suffering a great deal and he’d like to reach out and help him... But hearing Lenore point out his attractiveness like that, well, it made him realize he’d been taken by Alucard’s attractiveness. Had he not experimented so heavily with night creatures in his past he’d be questioning his sexuality around now.. He quietly took a seat next to Lenore. 

* * *

Striga knocked on the door of a human household. A tired looking human woman opened the door, “Hello,” she said, “can I help you?” 

“Do you have an adult son that lives with you that is so much of a disappointment you do not speak of him? He does not pay rent, he refuses to work, he does not go to school, contributes nothing, possibly lives in your basement?” 

Her eyes widened, “How did you know?” 

“May I take him from you?” 

“You’d do that?!” 

“Invite me in and I’ll do it for free,” 

“Come in, please!” she opened the door fully, and Striga stepped inside, “he’s in the basement.” 

Striga walked down into the basement, and found a tall, unkempt man, hunched over in front of some light up box, surrounded by empty cans of mountain dew. His hands were stained with orange dust. She said nothing to him as she immediately scooped him up and threw him over her shoulder. The man became belligerent though. He started rambling on about how he had resisted the temptations of a thousand sluts in his 29 years on this earth and how he would not be thwarted in his quest to earn his wizard powers. Striga realized she had to gag him before leaving and did so without effort. After that was all said and done she threw the man back over her shoulder and offered her thanks to his overjoyed mother on the way out. 

She didn’t think finding such a large virgin could be done so easily. It was almost too easy. But this man was definitely a virgin. It wouldn’t hurt to try and secure a few more. That would really make this orgy the talk of the century. 

* * *

At the end of the week the sisters held a brief meeting to update everyone on the progress they had made to ensure everything was going smoothly. 

“The magicians are on track to have everything we need ready, and our artisans are working on vulva decor as we speak.”

“ _ All _ of Hector’s fuck creatures are fantastic!” Lenore said, “We should really give the boy more credit sometimes. Go on, tell them what you’ve learned.” 

“It turns out they are all very eager to participate.” Hector seemed to really be excited to share what he had learned about his creatures, “They’d be doing this even if they weren’t bound to your command. Most of them were in hell for being unapologetic sluts and-” 

“Enough, we have the general idea.” Carmilla said, dismissing Hector.

“Whatever,” Morana added.

“It’s ok,” she quietly whispered to Hector, “I find it interesting. You’ve done a very good job!” then she spoke normally to the real people, “They really are incredibly enthusiastic and considerate lovers. If any of you want to take them for a spin, I highly recommend it.” 

“Did you make one with good thighs?” 

“There’s about  _ five  _ with excellent thighs.” Lenore answered smugly. 

Striga and Morana exchanged glances with each other for a few moments. It appeared to everyone else that an entire conversation took place between them though no one could be sure what had been said. Then Striga addressed everyone,

“I have ten adult virgins in storage.” 

“Ten?” Morana said.

“It was too easy. The humans just let me take them. Some of them even thanked me.” 

“Nothing’s  _ wrong _ with them?” Carmilla asked. 

“I sampled one, the taste is virgin but a little funny. They have horrible diets. Their flavor should improve if we feed them only fruit in the days leading up to the orgy. Or maybe we could try the grass feeding thing? I hear that’s trendy.”

“I’ll have to get more herbs from the magicians since you got so many,” Morana said, “I also had the idea of drugging the virgins prior to the feeding. It’ll get everyone really fucked up.” 

“I  _ love _ that idea.” 

“Brillant!” Lenore said.

“Fuck that’s good.” even Carmilla praised the idea. 

Lenore turned to Hector and quietly told him, “I told you we’d be feeding humanely. They’ll have a great time and won’t even know what hit them.” then she addressed the entire room, “On the matter of Dracula’s son, I’m not quite sure what’s happening I’m afraid. It took quite some time before we got a look,” 

Lenore thought back to dozing off when Hector pointed out that Adrian’s dick was out, and not soft for once. He cradled his erection between the same two oddly designed dolls he attempted to share a human meal with earlier and sobbed. He wasn’t even masturbating, just crying while cradling his dick between the two dolls. It would have been sad and pathetic if anyone else did it, but it didn’t matter what this boy did, it was impossible for it not to be beautiful. She called Carmilla over, who expressed her concern but agreed his equipment was of an acceptable length and girth.

“His equipment is suitable,” Carmilla said, “but I still have my concerns. If he does anything to fuck with the vibe he’s getting tossed out or locked in a closet for the duration of the event.” 

“If no one has anything else to add I think that’s all the business we have to discuss. Good work everyone!” 

* * *

A few days earlier… 

Adrian sat on the floor amidst the wreckage of his father’s still damaged library. It was another one of the many things in his life in need of repair. His Trevor and Sypha dolls sat lifelessly besides him. He held a vampire philosophy book in one hand in a human book on philosophy in the other. He seemed to be trying to compare the two. To find some commonality between them. To find anything that would explain his purpose. Then out of nowhere an envelope addressed to him fell on top of his lap. He paused for a moment and looked around, wondering where it came from. Could this have been something one of his parents left... hoping that he would one day find it? No, unfortunately the wax seal was from someone else. He broke the seal and read the contents. 

_ “Adrian Fahrenheit Tepes,  _

_ You are cordially invited  _

_ to the Biannual vampire orgy.  _

_ Join us for a night of hedonism and indulgence.  _

_ \-- The Styrian Ruling Council” _

Information on the date, time, and directions followed. An additional personalized note was written at the bottom. 

_ “P.S. I understand this might seem new and strange to you, as your father had withdrawn himself from our culture in later years, but I do hope you’ll attend and find the night to be an enjoyable learning experience. Please, do not hesitate to contact me if you have any questions or concerns. _

_ \-- Lenore the Diplomat, Styrian Ruling Council”  _

Adrian let go of the letter. He let out a dejected sigh as it drifted to the floor. He brought his hand to his face and sat aimlessly with his thoughts. He then sighed again before picking up Trevor and Sypha. He held them to his chest and began crying bishounen tears. 

Lenore and Hector looked on at this through the mirror. 

“I think it’s upset him,” Hector said with concern.

“He’s going through a difficult time, but he’ll realize this is exactly what he needs.”


	3. The Invitations Are Received

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the What We Do In The Shadows portion, when lines are given in script format, that's done to indicate that one character (or a pair of them) are talking individually, away from the rest of the group, to the documentary crew that's always following them around.

Adrian sat at his kitchen table, fried potatoes and mixed greens from his garden were plated in front of him. The orgy invitation rested beside his plate, Trevor and Sypha sat on the counter top. 

“Should I go to this?” he spoke to himself, “This might have been fun to go to with the two of you.” he looked at the dolls. 

“You should go!” he imitated Belmont, “Orgies are always a good time for all, lots of beer, lots of sex… oh wait, it’s a vampire orgy? ...They probably don’t have beer. But if I had that invitation I’d coat my penis in salt and get it consecrated, then I’d get in and stick it anything I could-” 

“You are an idiot!” he imitated Sypha, “You’re not fucking any vampires to death. You sneak and wait for the vampires to distract themselves with sex, and then you strike. Afterwards we can have our own orgy to celebrate. Both of you will serve me. I’m correct about this because I know everything.” 

“But we’d get you a consecrated Himalayan salt strap-on, Sypha-” 

“That is still a stupid plan.” 

“Anyway, you should go Alucard, and you should coat your dick in salt if you can and kill everyone, because they’re monsters.” 

“Yes! And that’s exactly why we left you all alone in this big empty house without any friends or anyone to talk to. Because we need to kill _monsters_.” 

Alucard sighed. He picked up the invitation and left the table to go to his magic mirror. Were vampires really monsters? Any more so than humans are? Where did that leave him? Maybe if he could see his friends again he’d feel like he was there with them. Maybe that would give him the mental clarity he needed. He had some hope left in him when he activated the mirror, maybe he’d see them bickering like they always did, maybe he’d see them having a good time fighting, or maybe he’d see Sypha dragging Trevor’s drunk ass out of some tavern. 

When he activated the mirror he saw Trevor and Sypha in the back of their wagon. They were fucking. Without him. He deactivated the mirror, sat on the ground and started crying. 

“My god I… “ he said aloud running his fingers along his head and through his angelic hair. _He_ should have been in the middle. Trevor’s cock should have been inside _his_ body, Sypha should have been kissing _him_ , and wrapping her icy fingers around _his_ throat... and _his_ hands should have been around Trevor’s throat.... no one could ever replace them. But maybe with enough sex he could forget. Maybe this orgy was a much needed opportunity to lose himself and forget about everything sad in his life, which was just about all of his life right now. 

* * *

“Everyone!” Nadja announced with glee, “look at what we just got! An invitation to the bi-annual orgy in Styria!!” she held the invitation up to the cameras. 

“You need to get our coffins ready for voyage, Guillermo.” Nandor said. 

Guillermo looked at the camera like he was about to get in over his head again, then looked back to his master, “Right on it, Master.” 

“What’s this?” Nadja read the back of the invitation, “there’s something here about mirror directions? What the fuck are mirror directions again?” 

Laszlo took the invitation from her and looked it over, “Hell if I know,” he threw it to Nandor. 

“Oh I remember! A lot of them have those magic mirrors in the old country. We used to have one.” 

Nandor and Nadja both looked at Laszlo with contempt. 

“What? It’s not like my fault it was broken!” 

* * *

* * *

Nadja: It was absolutely his fault.

* * *

* * *

Nandor: It was entirely Laszlo's fault. 

* * *

* * *

Nadja: He was wearing that stupid hat when it happened.

* * *

* * *

Laszlo: It was not my fault the mirror was broken. Besides, traveling by ship guarantees a good time for all. There’s always the _allure_ of the ship’s glory hole. Sometimes, they’ll even let you be the one inside the glory hole!

* * *

* * *

Guillermo: Well it seems like that mirror would have been convenient, but now I have to find a way to smuggle a bunch of vampires into Europe. *laughs nervously* The things you do when you want to become a vampire… *more nervous laughter* Seeing Europe will be fun at least.. I think. 

* * *

* * *

Nadja: What am I most excited about? *places her hand on her chest* I’m curious to see the old country again. And I did have some friends in Styria. I don’t think Laszlo knows this but… *reminiscing* I once spent a beautiful night of passion with Striga. I’ll never forget her thighs. *pause* I also spent a night with Carmilla. *sighs* It’s going to be a really good orgy. Don’t even get me started on Lenore. 

* * *

* * *

Laszlo: Lenore is incredible. 

Nadja: Every time we’ve been with her, it’s been amazing. 

Laszlo: Oh yes. 

Nadja: It was only one time, but still...

Laszlo: When you’re with her, you have absolutely no control. She makes you think you have it! But you don’t! You don’t have any!

Nadja: *agreeing* You have none. 

Laszlo: By the end of the whole thing she’s rendered you completely helpless and dependent on her. There’s nothing else quite like it. 

Nadja: It’s quite an experience. She is very cruel... but very tender.

Laszlo: She’s probably insane. 

Nadja: Yes, she is a little bit out there… 

Laszlo: But who of us isn’t? That’s no reason to judge her! 

* * *

* * *

“Hold on,” Nandor said, “before we start getting all of the dildos ready we need a plan on how to present ourselves. What are we going to say when they ask how things are in the new world?” 

“Well, most of them don’t really know what’s going on here,” Laszlo said, “we can tell them whatever we’d like.” 

“We can tell them we have subjugated Staten Island.” Nadja said

“I don’t think they actually know how big the new world is…” Nandor said. 

“No, I don’t think they do.” 

They all paused in thought for a moment before unanimously agreeing that they’d say they subjugated Staten Island, and let the old world vampires think whatever they wanted to think. The goal was to improve their image and influence, and get invited to more parties. 

“Guillermo!” Nandor called out, “We need to go shopping. We need to get some new world dildos or butt eggs or sounding tubes or something similar to bring our hosts.” 

* * *

Alucard stood in front of his wardrobe. He opened it, looked at the several shirts and jackets that hung inside, and sighed. 

“What does one even wear to this sort of thing?” he wondered out loud. He looked at the invitation he held in his hand again, and wondered if he should take Lenore up on her offer and ask what was customary at these types of events. Then he sighed and dropped the invitation. “No, I’ll seem like an idiot for asking,” he thought to himself, “Might as well dress as I always do. I suppose someone’s bound to tear it all off of me anyway.” 

He closed the wardrobe and sighed. 


	4. The Day Of

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally this was going to be a smaller part of one big chapter, but it was getting a little too big, so I'm splitting it up. This will lead into the beginning of the orgy (which will start in the next chapter)

Hector stood in his workshop, shirtless, just in case Lenore happened to walk in. He forged plenty of fuck creatures for the orgy that would be happening tonight, but now he had to make up for lost time by forging regular night creatures for Carmilla’s army.

He picked up his hammer and forged one night creature, and then another. He almost had an assembly line set up with a few already forged night creatures. It ran smoothly enough as long as Hector wasn’t interrupted. 

“Hector!” 

He heard Striga call out as she walked in. Cezar got up from his little bed near Hector and trotted over to greet Striga with a dildo in his mouth. Dildos were all over the castle as of late, and according to reanimated dogs they made great chew toys. 

Hector sighed and lowered his hammer. 

“Yes?” he asked. 

“Catch!” 

She threw a box of cans of Mountain Dew and two bags of Spicy Sweet Chili Doritos at Hector. He failed to catch the chips, and luckily dodged the soda. Striga squinted her eyes and shook her head in disappointment. 

“You really need to work on your reflexes…” 

“Yes, well.” Hector averted his gaze. He wanted to make some sarcastic remark about how he was too busy forging and running around doing whatever Lenore (and now, the rest of them) wanted him to do at a moment’s notice, but decided against it. 

Striga took the dildo out of Cezar’s mouth and threw it across the room. He ran and caught it mid-air with a perfectly timed jump. 

“His reflexes are good.” 

Hector brought a hand to his face and exhaled. 

“I thought Lenore was training you?”

Hector sighed. “You know that’s not how she’s train-” 

“Oh right.” Striga cringed as the realization hit her, “I had suppressed that memory. I worry about Lenore. You do understand that is not normal vampire behavior?” 

“uh… yes” Hector sighed as he changed the subject “...but what are all these things you threw at me?!” 

“That stuff is some human food for the familiar room. I assume it’s good because the virgins keep asking for it.” Not that the virgins were getting it. They were only getting grass. 

“Oh..” Hector looked at her in surprise, “thank you.” 

“Work on those reflexes. ” she said as she left. 

Hector asked a night creature to collect the snacks and bring them to the familiar room. He picked up his hammer again, only to be interrupted by Morana.

“Human,” she said, peering in through the door. 

Hector put down his hammer and sighed. “Yes?”

“I am sure you understand that not a word is to be spoken about the army you are building for us tonight,” she stepped inside. As she did Cezar ran up to her with the dildo, she took it and threw it for him to chase after. Afterwards, she glared directly at Hector, “None of us want to see our dear sister upset over her pet’s lost functionality because he accidentally said something he wasn’t supposed to.” 

“Understood.” If Hector wasn’t so exhausted he might have wanted to make a sarcastic remark about how the “loss of functionality” might be a nice break from things. It’s not like the ring would let him slip up like that, now that he was explicitly forbidden from speaking about his work. 

Morana left without saying anything else. Hector paused for a moment before he picked up his hammer yet again. He was finally about to forge now, only to be interrupted by Lenore walking in this time.

“Hello baby!” she chimed 

Hector sighed, and lowered his hammer. This wouldn’t be over quickly. “Hello..” 

“All ready for the big event?” 

“To be honest, I’m still-” 

“Of course you aren’t ready,” she interrupted. “Now, I know my sisters don’t want you participating in the events of the evening, but I don’t want you feeling left out, so I brought you something.”

She walked right up to the table and placed several boxes, the type that appeared to contain clothing, on top of the body Hector had been getting ready to forge. 

Cezar ran up to greet Lenore, still carrying that well chewed on dildo with him. She took it, threw it for him to chase after, and then looked back at Hector. 

He paused and looked at Lenore directly. 

“Well, go on. Open them.” 

“Yes…” Hector replied, slightly worried about what he might find.. He opened the first. It contained a black chest harness. “...thank you, this is?”

“That’s for you to wear tonight!” she clasped her hands together in excitement. 

“I thought I wouldn’t be participating…” 

“Well, no,” Lenore almost looked disappointed about that, “but you’ll be running around helping out. I won’t have you feeling like you don’t fit in.” 

“How considerate…” 

“You know not to expect anything less from me, now onto the next one!” 

The next box contained a collar. An engraved gold tag hung from it that read “Property of Lenore,” and “DO NOT EAT” was written all around the outside of the collar. The last box contained a pair of metallic blue booty shorts that had “DO NOT FUCK” written on the behind. 

Hector sighed. “Wearing this ring isn’t enough?” 

“You don’t like them?” Lenore pouted. 

“No.. it’s not that, they’re all very high quality… it’s just...”

“It’s just what?” she looked sadder, “I think you’ll look very pretty in this. And I wanted everyone to see what a cute boy I have.” 

“um... “ He blushed a little, “The writing…. Is it uh.. really necessary?” 

She took his hand in hers, “That’s to keep you safe, and to let everyone know this pretty boy is mine. Our guests need to know you’re off limits.”

Hector looked at the ring on his finger, swallowed his pride and thanked her. 

“May I resume my work now?” Cezar ran up to Hector with the dildo and jumped at his legs. Hector sighed. He took the dildo from Cezar and threw it for him to chase after. 

“Forget about that! You’re trying these on now!”


	5. The Orgy Begins

The night of the orgy had finally arrived. The party had begun and guests were arriving. Carmilla wore a red latex bodysuit with a tit window. Lenore wore black thigh high boots, lacy black lingerie with light blue trim and a demi-cup bra. Morana and Striga were giving guests tours and highlighting all of the extravagant vulva sculptures, paintings, and topiaries the castle had been decorated with precisely for this occasion, as well as pointing out all of the sex toys that were available. Morana carried a riding crop with her and wore sandals with a chiton held in place with a pair of ornate fibulae. Striga had her hair plaited into a French braid and wore the lesbian flag as a cape with a suit of armor that was not only beautiful, but historically accurate and functional.

* * *

A/N: Check out  [ https://www.reddit.com/r/armoredwomen/ ](https://www.reddit.com/r/armoredwomen/) for a better idea of what I’m talking about when I say historically accurate and functional armor

* * *

Outside, the vampires from Staten Island were discussing a few things as they walked up to the castle. 

Nadja and Laslow were discussing Laszlo’s hat. 

“I can’t believe you’re wearing that stupid hat!” Nadja shouted at her husband.

“This hat will get us in with the VIP’s. There’s no way I wasn’t wearing this hat!” Laszlo replied. “I don’t understand why you don’t like it.” 

“There’s a bloody curse on that  _ stupid _ hat!” 

Meanwhile Nandor was engaged in some sort of philosophical discussion with Guillermo. 

“Guillermo,” he asked as Nadja and Laszlo argued with each other in the background, “Do you think it is possible to find love at a place like this… or is it all meaningless hedonism we engage in to stave off the boredom of immortality?” 

“I don’t know, Master… maybe?” Guillermo replied awkwardly. 

“Hmm…. Tell me Guillermo, do you think I should leave these dildos attached to myself before we enter or-”

“Did you know those are called flying buttresses,” Colin Robinson pointed out the feature of the castle, “it’s an architectural feature that-” 

“No!” Nandor said. 

“Oh come on!” Laszlo added, “We need all the energy we can get tonight Robinson!” 

* * *

* * *

Guillermo: I really wasn’t expecting this place to be so  _ huge _ . What preparations did I make for tonight? … it’s not that I want to kill anyone tonight. But you know, a lot of crazy things have been going on with my master and his roommates and I need to protect my master if he’s going to make me a vampire, so I, uh, *opens up his cardigan, revealing some wooden stakes and vials of holy water* took a few precautions with me. *closes cardigan* But these are only things that will be used if absolutely necessary. 

* * *

* * *

After being escorted into the main parlor they were greeted by Lenore. She immediately walked over to Laszlo and Nadja. “Hello. Have you two been a good boy and girl while you’ve been away from me?” 

“Yes, Mummy.” Laszlo said with his head bowed. 

* * *

* * *

Laszlo: Now you see, when I called Lenore “Mummy,” it was not because she is my mother-- far from it! It’s all part of a sexual role-play dynamic. It’s  _ very _ erotic. 

* * *

* * *

When Guillermo entered the Familiar room, he was greeted by the usual mix of familiars, diverse in age, race, and appearance. There wasn’t much else in the room. A couple of folding chairs, a cheap table with the two bags of spicy sweet chili doritos and 12 or so cans of Mountain Dew on top of it. A box of extra dildos and lube was in a corner, and the walls were shelved with extra towels. A little undead dog laid down on a small dog bed in the corner of the room chewing on a dildo. A familiar clearly dressed for an orgy sat on the floor next to him and was giving him pets. Some of the familiars were dressed for an orgy, while others wore plain street clothes like Guillermo. It sounded like they were making the usual familiar small talk, discussion on who their masters were and how long they thought it’d be until they got turned. Guillermo didn’t see anyone he recognized like he would have back in New York, so he introduced himself. 

“Hi,” Guillermo said with a wave, “I’m Guillermo here with Nandor the Relentless, from Staten Island.” 

A few familiars responded in turn, introducing themselves. There was a young black woman named Sara, here with Darla the Merciless. A tall white man that looked to be in his late-thirties named Stephen, that was here with Joyti the Ruthless. Juni, a small young Asian man here with William the Bloody. As well there were several of them that didn’t seem to be up for conversation. Hector normally would have been one of them, but he found himself being coaxed into the conversation. 

“Don’t be shy,” Sara poked Hector. He was sitting on the floor next to Cezar. 

He sighed before speaking, “I’m Hector. I work for Lenore… and the rest of them.” He sounded exhausted, “This is Cezar.” 

“Damn they must treat you well! Familiars never get event rooms this big.” Juni said, “or this much food,” he grabbed one of the bags of chips and started eating, “So how long have you all been at this? I’ve been at this 7 years now.”

“11 years,” Guillermo nodded with an awkward smile. 

“3 years,” Sara said, “Darla says she’ll definitely turn me by 15.” she took a handful of chips out of the bag and started eating them. 

“17 years,” Stephen said, “I’m sure I’ll be turned any day now.” 

“4 months... “ Hector confusedly said, “What’s this about being turned?” 

“You know… becoming a vampire... It’s why you’re working for them…” Juni said with a hint of confusion. 

“Are you implying… that you all work for your masters voluntarily?” 

“Wait, are you not working voluntarily?” Guillermo asked. 

“How’d that happen?” Sara asked. 

“... I don’t want to talk about it.” Hector said with an exasperated sigh. 

“Are they giving you anything?” 

Hector sighed, “Food, a house outside the castle-” 

“You don’t have to pay rent?” Guillermo asked, “I have to pay rent. Do you guys all have to pay rent?” 

All of the other familiars were surprised. They all had to pay rent to their masters, none of them got free housing, or free food, or free clothing. When they got Hector to imply Lenore was engaging in sexual relations with him, most of them lost it and were quite jealous their own masters weren’t doing the same with them. They were all certain she’d turn him soon since she gave him what they all insisted was a wedding ring. He had to get away from them. Better to be near Lenore or one of her sisters if they had any errands for him to run than to be surrounded by more humans he was fated to not get along with. 

Of course Lenore would tell him _ “familiars are what other vampires call their pets,”  _ when the two things turned out to be completely different categories. And the humans with the better deal, the one that came with some autonomy, wanted the slave deal he had? Ok, his deal wasn’t all that bad, but they really were insane to actually _want_ it. Humanity really did need to be reduced to livestock. At least one of them had resumed playing with Cezar for him as he left the room. 

* * *

“Nadja!” Carmilla smirked as she called Nadja over from across the room. She began walking towards Nadja, making the three vampire boys that had been licking her boots crawl behind her. Nadja excitedly ran over to her. They hugged when they met each other and exchanged the usual pleasantries. 

“Tell me Nadja, how are things going in the new world.” Carmilla’s boys resumed licking her boots. 

“Well,” Nadja said with a crafty smile, “we have full control of Staten Island now!” 

Carmilla’s eyes grew wide with intrigue, “Really? You have my congratulations. Do tell me more.” 

“It is very good,” Nadja shrugged, “There’s a nice supply of virgins. We are very comfortable.”

“Only comfortable?” she narrowed her eyes, “Are those male idiots blocking you from expanding?” 

“You know,” Nadja’s expression changed as she thought about Carmilla’s question, “they are. Especially my stupid husband!” 

“If you want my advice, I suggest surrounding yourself with a few women you can trust. Then find some way to contain the men or take them out entirely.” 

“Right now I have Jenna... but she is still a fresh baby learning how to use her powers.” 

“Give it a few decades and you’ll own the place. Trust me.” 

The conversation the two were having was cut short when Morana announced that the virgins were arriving. The group of them were tied together, Striga dragged them in effortlessly. 

“Before we get started,” Morana said, “the first surprise of the night, is that this isn’t just virgin blood, but virgin drug blood. The virgins in black are drunk on alcohol, the ones in green are high on sativas, the ones in purple are high on indicas. Mind your limits.” 

“There’s Viagra scattered about if you end up getting weed-dick!” Lenore shouted to the room.

Striga and Morana laughed to themselves. Their rooms wouldn’t be affected by that problem. 

“The second surprise,” Striga announced, “well we need to say it now before we get too fucked up to remember… Fuck creatures.” 

Everyone was confused for a moment, and then all of Hector’s fuck creatures made their grand entrance and everyone started applauding and cheering. 

“Now we can begin!” 

Carmilla took the first bite of a virgin and then everyone else joined in, passing the virgins around.

Adrian arrived late and initially went unnoticed. When he walked in he was greeted with the sight of a vampire hoard tearing a group of adult virgins to shreds. He didn’t even have the chance to feel as though he was far too overdressed before someone passed him a virgin. He wasn’t one to normally partake in blood drinking, but he decided he’d be trying new things today. Things that would take the place of therapy and help him lose himself. Help him forget the pain. He took a drink. 

* * *

“HECTOR!” Lenore called out, and he was there almost instantly, “Start cleaning up these bodies we can’t have these lying around.” 

“Yes, Mistress.” He began dragging a body out of the room. 

“Guillermo!” Nandor called. Guillermo arrived shortly. 

“Yes Master?” 

“Why are you taking so long!? Be more like Lenore’s familiar! Stop making us look like bad guests. Help him clean up!” 

“Sorry, right on it Master.” Guillermo replied as he ran off to help Hector carry the bodies. 

“Lenore,” Nandor commented, “your familiar is so obedient…”

“Thank you! He is a very good boy.” she said with pride. 

“Do you have a technique you are willing to share? Or is there some place that yields good familiars?” 

“It’s simple really,” Lenore replied. “You have to spend quality time with them, and giving gifts doesn’t hurt either.” 

“I got Guillermo a glitter portrait of us for his 2 year familiar-versary...” he said as he tried thinking about what else he needed to do.

“I love it!” Lenore beamed, “I’ll have to have one done for Hector!” 

“But there has to be more to it. Yours was here instantly, mine always takes forever! Is there anything else?” 

“Hmm… well, we wear these matching bands enchanted with a binding spell.” she showed off her ring, “And I’m also fucking him. He’s gotten quite good at it with a little training!” 

Nandor cringed and looked directly at the cameras. “Oh.. I see… this has been.. very informative… thank you.” he said as he began distancing himself. 

* * *

* * *

Nandor: That is not normal. Sometimes you might fall in love and turn a human before you fuck them, maybe you get bored once in a while and fuck your food before you eat it, but this prolonged fucking of humans *cringing and shaking his head* it is not normal. 

* * *

* * *

“Laszlo,” Nando said, “I think our hosts are a little crazy… maybe we should leave.” 

“Why on Earth would we do that?” Laszlo responded, “Did you not see their magnificent fuck creatures???” 

“I just found out one of them is…” he started to whisper, “fucking their familiar.” 

“Well, that’s no reason to judge them!”

“You don’t think that’s a little repulsive?” 

“I don’t know about that. Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it! Besides if it’s Lenore, it very well could be an elaborate part of one of her erotic mind games!” 

“There’s actually a long detailed history on vampire/human interrelationships."  Colin Robinson chimed in, “In Bulgarian folklore-” 

“Go do that to someone who doesn’t need their energy! These fuck creatures are going to need all I can give them!” 

“Hmmm….” Nandor mused, “Maybe there is something to it. Do you think Guillermo would be better if I fucked him?” 

“Bloody hell if I know, but I need to get myself to that tentacle fuck creature!” 

* * *

“You uh, want me to get the other half?” Guillermo asked. 

“Whatever,” Hector shrugged and he continued dragging a body outside. 

Guillermo picked up the arms and followed Hector’s lead. “So.. you taking them to a bog? Sinkhole? Furnace? It doesn’t seem like you have to worry about getting rid of bodies in such a remote location.” 

“Intact bodies are preserved outside,” he said without any emotion, “limbs and other pieces go in the compost bins inside the greenhouse.” The greenhouse was a designated lesbian zone tonight, so Hector couldn’t go inside to deposit the limbs later, but he’d still get in trouble for not depositing the limbs. 

“Alright then…” Guillermo got the message that Hector was one of those familiars that wasn’t up for conversation. They threw the body into a snow drift outside. As they walked away some night creatures ran up to get the body and carry it off for forging later. Guillermo had seen enough in his 11 years of service to not bother asking questions. 

As they walked back inside to collect more limbs and bodies, they were greeted by a sight of impossible beauty that hindered their beings.

“Oh my god he actually came.” Hector said in surprise. 

Adrian was even more beautiful in person. It was almost too much for Hector to handle. Guillermo was also rendered speechless by the sight of him. All they could do was stop and stare. Hair glistening in the candle light, draining the last drop of life out of a limp helpless body, a small stream of blood running from his lips, a single, sparkling, bishounen human tear rolling down his porcelain cheek-- 

It wasn’t just Hector and Guillermo that were rendered awestruck by Adrian. Slowly, one by one, just about every vampire and fuck creature present was looking at him. They were muttering to themselves wondering who this person was. 

“Who is that gorgeous woman?” Striga asked Morana. “Do you think she’s sapphic? She has to be.” 

“My word she’s... I don’t think that’s a woman.” Morana answered in confusion. 

“What?” Striga squinted and looked at Adrian again, “... how is such a thing possible?”

“I do not know…” 

“Is this the drug blood?” 

“Maybe this is the drug blood.” 

“Could she be trans?” 

“I do not think so….” Morana took Striga by the hand and began leading her away, “I think it’s time we head to the sapphic quarters.” While they walked they kept trying to figure out the enigma of how a vision such as the one they just witnessed, was not a woman. 

Slowly, the more forward guests and fuck creatures made their way over to Adrian to introduce themselves.

Adrian let the body he was eating fall to the floor. Forgoing therapy, he grabbed a fistful of Viagra out of a candy dish and said “Don’t hold back, there’s more than enough of me to go around tonight.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally this chapter was going to be much longer, so I decided to split it up.


	6. The Orgy Continues

“Guillermo.” Nandor found his familiar stuck in the daze the sight of Adrian had left him in. 

“Yes, Master!?” He quickly snapped out of it. 

“Have I been treating you well?” 

“Um… yeah, I mean… well enough… I think… Master. Just you know… been waiting a while… for you to uh, turn me into a-” 

“You are always bringing that up!” Nandor got annoyed. 

“Well…” Guillermo nervously continued, “It’s been 11 years and I did save your life a few times-” 

“I found out one of our hosts is fucking their familiar.” 

“Yeah.” Guillermo nodded anxiously, “a bunch of us found out in the familiar room-” 

“Do you want me to fuck you, Guillermo?” 

Guillermo looked over to the cameras, as if he was asking for help, then back to Nandor, then back to the cameras again, then back to Nandor before he answered, “Uh… I don’t… know Master?” 

“Do you think it would get  _ weird _ ?” 

“...I uh..” Guillermo kept looking back at the camera, “Never really thought about it… I don’t know.” 

“It would probably get weird.” 

“....p-probably.” 

“Lenore did seem a little crazy.” 

“You have a keen sense of judgement, Master.” 

“...but her familiar was so obedient.” 

“Is there something you needed from me… Master? Not that I’m not happy to entertain-” 

“....hmmm not right now. You can go.” 

* * *

Lenore opened the door to a room, only to find Carmilla pegging Alucard inside of it while her three boys kneeled on the opposite side of the room and watched. 

“You whore.” Lenore coolly said to Carmilla. 

“Yes, he truly is an excellent little whore.” Carmilla casually responded as Alucard bounced up and down on her strap. 

“You’re being too rough with him!” Lenore chided, “You’re doing him all wrong-” 

“Oh bloody hell, Lenore! I just want to enjoy my drug blood and screw a twink. Go find some humans or dogs or whatever it is you're into to play with.”

“No, this boy needs  _ gentle _ dominance-” 

“I’m fine,” Alucard moaned, “whatever your name was… you can go so much haaaarder-” 

“If you’re jealous,” Carmilla grabbed a fistful of Alucard’s flaxen hair and pulled, causing him to yelp, “I don’t mind sharing. His mouth isn’t being used at the moment.” 

Adrian let out a moan hearing Carmilla say that. 

Carmilla knew exactly what type of move she was making when she made Lenore that offer. Long ago, Carmilla and Lenore tried having sexual relations with each other for the fun of it. They came to the conclusion that it could never work with them both being tops. They accepted this, but still tried to see if things would work with a third. These experiments were unsuccessful. They still always ended up trying to top each other, along with the third, in the end. It wasn’t meant to be. 

“That won’t be necessary, I can wait my turn unlike some people.” Lenore spoke calmly.

“I can handle both of you.  _ Please _ -” Adrian moaned as Lenore shut the door and left. 

Lenore outwardly remained calm, but she was quite upset about the whole thing. She had an entire plan for seducing and adopting this boy if he showed up but never anticipated Carmilla. She didn’t anticipate getting too caught up with Bavarian dignitaries to make the first move either. But Carmilla didn’t even want to invite him originally, let alone fuck him. And Carmilla knew that her Lenore wanted to peg that boy specifically. The whole thing was incredibly childish but Lenore wasn’t going to just let Carmilla get away with this. She wasn’t some small weak girl that would just let people walk all over her like this. She was getting even. 

But first she needed to clear her head a bit. She headed to the nearest sapphic room, that was the semi-indoor greenhouse. Lenore was showered with ecofriendly biodegradable glitter upon entry. As she walked past a small legion of women, and a pair of fuck creatures entangled into some sort of a fuck-ball, she found herself quite impressed with what Morana had done with the place. It somehow felt like a Grecian island or San Junipero: a sapphic vaporwave paradise. Exotic plants, sand, glowing neon vulva lights, projection of the waters, it really was nice. And Lenore found what she came in here for! 

She sat on an ornately carved and upholstered armchair with an open bottom while an anonymous guest lying beneath it ate her out, thinking about what to do. The answer came to her as she did. She got up without a thought. Another guest took her place on the seat. 

Lenore exited the room and called for Hector. Surprisingly he wasn’t too far away. He was carrying some limbs he planned on leaving outside the greenhouse because he couldn’t bring them inside.

“Yes, Lenore?” 

“You’ve been such a good boy this evening. Everyone is very impressed with your fuck creatures, and some of our guests have told me they wish they had familiars as attentive as you are.”

“Yes… about that title of  _ familiar _ -” 

“I’ve decided I’m going to reward you.” 

“Oh,” Hector wasn’t expecting that. At least not now. He knew if she was happy she’d probably find something  _ she _ liked to reward him with after the event was over. “... thank you.” 

“Hector, you can participate.” 

“What?” he nearly dropped the limbs he was still carrying, “But I thought-” 

“You’re mine. If I say you can participate, you can participate.” 

“Am I still responsible for corpse removal?” 

“You can do that later!” she slapped the limbs out of his arms, “Now, you’re coming with me. I need your help with something.” 

Lenore led Hector up several flights of stairs, though hallways full of vampires fucking vampires and vampires fucking monsters, and even monsters fucking monsters. Apparently some of the fuck creatures had decided groups of vampires weren’t enough for them and began engaging in their own group sex. And the vampires that had been left behind found the whole thing too intriguing not to watch. Lenore even stopped leading Hector for a little while to watch the bizarre yet erotic lovecraftian display his fuck creatures were putting on. But she couldn’t let them get too caught up in that. Eventually she decided it was time to go and resumed pulling Hector along until they reached their destination. 

When Hector realized where she had led him he stepped back, “Is this,” he whispered, “Carmilla’s room.” 

“Yes it is.” Lenore said coolly as she began jimmying the lock with a magical pick.

“Why?” 

The lock opened, and Lenore pulled Hector inside. 

There was a huge bed, a section of one of the walls was lined with various whips, chains, floggers, restraints, and other sex toys. Another wall was embedded with three with long chain leashes, what appeared to be three large dog beds rested on the floor beneath the leashes. 

“Lenore,” Hector had become even more anxious, “why are we here?” 

Lenore walked over to a cabinet and opened it. There were a few cold canisters of blood inside. She rummaged through them until she found the virgin blood, and took a glass out of the cabinet with it. She poured herself some and took a sip.

“Get on the bed and play with yourself.” she ordered, “Make sure your jizz gets everywhere.” 

“Are you insane? Carmilla will-” 

“Carmilla won’t hurt you. I have the entire situation under control. Now put on a show for me.” 

“Yes, Lenore.” Hector hesitantly got on the bed and began to do as she said. But he was still afraid Lenore really had lost her mind and that Carmilla would kill him for this, so he couldn’t be as quick about it as Lenore wanted. Lenore found herself getting turned on by how afraid Hector looked and decided the poor boy needed some help. So she got on the bed and helped him. She helped him at least three times, throwing in some prostate stimulation to make sure the mess he left was sizable, and even ended up leaving a mess or two of her own. 

Of course the semen proofing spells on the castle would clean this all up instantly, but Carmilla would still see evidence of what happened. She’d be very unhappy that an animal had been in her bed. She’d be even more unhappy that a vampire had fucked an animal in her bed. 

Before they left she offered Hector some of the virgin blood in her glass. He initially said no, but Lenore had this way of making people do things without realizing they had done them, and before he knew it the rim of the glass was pressed against his lips and he was having a taste. 

“What do you think?” she asked as Hector shuddered in revulsion from the taste, “You don’t like it?” 

“No..” he handed the glass back to her. She placed the half empty glass on Carmilla’s night stand, “That’s fine. You’ll come like it when I turn you.” 

Hector’s eyes grew wide, “Turn me?” he thought back to what the familiars had said, and began wondering if he really had been technically married this whole time. 

“What?” she laughed at his surprise, “You didn’t think I’d let you age, did you? But we have more to do now, come on.” she took his hand and led him out.


	7. The Infinite Corridor

Some time had passed. Adrian felt like he was in a dream. He couldn’t get enough of being passed around like a cheap whore. Maybe his father’s people were onto something, or maybe it was the drug blood, possibly it was some combination of the two. He felt another set of hands clawing at him, dragging him away. A sultry voice said, “You’re coming with me.” He couldn’t believe the night was still so young. 

“Should we exchange names or would you rather keep this anonymous?” He helped himself up, and closely followed Lenore’s lead. Hector anxiously trailed close behind. 

Lenore laughed to herself, “You already earned quite a reputation for yourself tonight Adrian.” he was unfortunately, something of a sticky mess, though his hair amazingly remained pristine, “I’m Lenore, but you can call me Mommy if you’d like.”

“Oh,” Adrian’s face went pink, “Forgive me. I’d gotten so carried away with the festivities I’d forgotten to introduce myself to my hosts. Thank you for having me.” 

“Thank me again after I’ve actually had you.” she smiled, “Have you been enjoying vampire culture?” 

Hector knew exactly what Lenore was doing. He didn’t want to admit that he hoped it would work. The opportunity to play with a man this beautiful wasn’t unappealing. 

Adrian happily sighed, “I’m finding it’s exactly what I need at the moment.” 

“Good. By the way, have you met Hector?” Lenore pulled Hector next to her, so that he was facing Adrian. “I’ve been teaching him about vampire culture. Would you mind if he joins us?” 

Hector’s face flushed immediately. He was certain she wanted to adopt Adrian and, should that happen, he’d get to play with him. But he only vaguely suspected she was planning to involve him in this… because how could she possibly expect him to perform so soon again after what she had him do in Carmilla’s room? Did she forget he was a human with human stamina, or did she simply not care? Or maybe she was planning on having him bottom exclusively. She had to be- 

Hector wasn’t able to complete that thought. 

“A human is all you have to throw at me?” Adrian smirked, “There’s no need to hold back.” 

Hector gave Adrian an exceptionally nervous look, trying to tell him not to underestimate anything Lenore presents you with. That was a guaranteed way of pissing her off.

Lenore smirked and laughed softly as she pat Hector’s crotch. “You'll see, he’s quite well endowed.” 

* * *

  
  


“Lazlo!” a glitter covered Nadja shouted at her husband, who was suspended in the air, in the middle of getting consentacled by a fuck creature, “You are getting rid of that stupid hat!” 

“I will do no such thing! My friend here quite likes it!” 

“I was talking with Carmilla, and we could have taken over all five boroughs and a sizable chunk of Long Island by now if it wasn’t for that stupid curse on that stupid hat! The bloody thing attracts witches!” 

“Oh Nadja,” Lazlo laughed, “if anything, my hat is the reason we’re doing as well as we are! It’s a very good hat!” 

_“Agggggghhhh!”_ Nadja groaned, then she levitated to Laszlo’s level, and threw the hat off of his head. But the hat didn’t fall to the ground. The hat became suspended in the air, and began to rotate as the infinite corridor spilled out of it and moved around. 

Some guests paused their fucking to observe the curiosity as it flashed scenes from unknown dimensions, lost worlds, and the Metal Gear Solid universe.

Lenore, Adrian, and Hector were among the guests that initially paid the infinite corridor no special attention. Sure, it was an interesting curiosity, but they’d all seen plenty of weirder things happen. Lenore was reveling far too much in making Adrian take her biggest strap, Hector was focused doing his best to maintain his erection after all he’d been through (his training did not include Viagra), and Adrian was enjoying himself too much to care.

* * *

Meanwhile, far away from Styria, Issac had been sharing a pot of tea with Miranda. After killing the magician, he realized he could go to Styria whenever he wanted Hector to catch these hands, so there was no rush. He could afford to spend some time in the company of another forgemaster, especially one that wasn’t a complete idiot. 

“So, when will you finally show me this  _ malaka _ you want to throw hands with?” Miranda asked as a night creature with purple eyes poured her tea.

“Now is as fine a time as any.” Isaac answered. He snapped his fingers and one of his night creatures presented him with the box containing the small magic mirror he’d been gifted. “Sir Mirror, show me my wish.” 

Both forgemasters stared at the mirror for a moment before Issac broke the silence. 

“I suppose now is not as fine a time as any.” As he reached to close the box, Miranda’s hand reached over and stopped him. 

“No. This is a very good time. Keep watching and you’ll find a good opportunity for a surprise attack. They’re all distracted.” 

“No.” Issac closed the mirror, “Seeing that traitor _enjoying himself_ so much after what he did sickens me.” 

* * *

Out of curiosity, Adrian did turn and look at the infinite corridor once or twice. The first time he saw a lot of fog and an odd looking fellow with a triangular shaped head. The second time, he saw something hauntingly familiar.

He went pale as he realized what it was. His parents embracing. Looking directly at him. From hell. While he was in the middle of three way with a human, and with a vampire he’d been calling “Mommy.” 

Hector saw it too. His former master. The one he betrayed. A man that had given him respect. Looking directly at him. While he was fucking his son. 

Hector went limp. He would have pulled away on his own had Adrian not pushed him back and shouted “safe word!” before running off. 

The vision barely lasted for a few seconds before it flashed to a vision of two grown men taking a children’s card game far too seriously. No words were exchanged, but lengthy, direct eye contact had been made. The damage had already been done. 

Adrian ran for a window, but didn’t make it that far. He found a vase and started vomiting. Hector ran after Adrian to try and console him. 

“I know that was bad,” Hector said. He held back Adrian’s golden locks as he threw up coagulated virgin blood and undissolved Viagra tablets, “it was bad for me too…if you want to talk-”

“Hector!” Lenore made her way over to the two of them. She wasn’t happy, “Why didn’t you mind his gag reflex!”

* * *

Carmilla, covered in glitter, walked back into the parlor, feeling especially relaxed after spending time in the company of intelligent women that knew exactly what they were doing. But all of that went to shit when she saw the infinite corridor just floating about in the middle of her castle, dropping out none other than Dio Brando. 

**“AH HA HA HA!”** Dio laughed as he struck his signature pose, “You expected something fun and cool to come out of the infinite corridor, **BUT IT WAS _ME_ , DIO!**” 

The room collectively groaned, sighed, and glared at Dio. Some guests began shouting  **_“DIO!!!”_ ** with contempt. Cezar ran out of the familiar room and started to bark and growl at Dio from a safe distance. The fuck creatures even realized Dio was a massive mood killer and glared at him. 

“Read the room, Dio!” Carmilla heels clicked as she approached the worst party crasher in existence, “You weren’t invited for a reason. Fuck off back to Egypt!” 

“What’s this, are  _ you _ , approaching  _ ME _ ?” 

“I can’t throw you the fuck out of my orgy without getting closer.” she said as she struck a flamboyant Jojo pose, showing off her particularly sharp nails. Then she snapped her fingers and summoned her stand,  **_“BIKINI KILL!”_ **

_ “Yare yare daze.” _ Lenore muttered under her breath, having to walk away from whatever weird human-half problem Adrian was apparently dealing with because Carmilla would undoubtedly need back up. She struck a pose and summoned her stand. “ **_TOXIC!!_ ** ” 

Morana and Striga appeared, covered in eco-friendly biodegradable glitter. They struck a joint pose and summoned their stands.  **_“KIYOKO!” “GRACE JONES!!”_ **

Hector wasn’t entirely sure what was happening, but didn’t want to be scolded if Lenore ended up needing backup. And so he regrettably left Adrian and struck a pose before summoning his stand,  **_“THRILLER!”_ **

Dio burst into laughter. It was laughable that they thought he could be thrown out of any orgy that he crashed. 

While this confrontation was beginning, Nandor found his familiar and pulled him aside. “Guillermo,” he leaned in and whispered, “this guy is really annoying. He’s always ruining orgies and parties like this. Can you uhhh… take ‘ _ care’ _ of him?”

“Sure thing. I’ll get right on that, Master.” Guillermo said. 

“You know when I say take care of him I mean kill him, yes?” 

Guillermo nodded, as he reached for one of the stakes in his cardigan. He wasn’t completely confident he could do this, but he hadn’t failed yet when it came to killing vampires. Even if the vast majority of his kills were accidental.

Everyone was surprised to see a human familiar start running, full speed, brandishing a stake, directly at Dio. Dio immediately summoned his stand,  **_“ZA WARUDO!!!”_ ** and stopped time. For some reason, Guillermo wasn’t affected by this. His stake went through Dio like a knife though always soft vegan butter. 

Time resumed. 

Dio crumbled into a pile of ash. 

Cezar ran over to that pile of ash, lifted his leg, and peed on it. Dio was the one that killed him before Hector brought him back the first time. 

Everyone was confused for a moment, but then started cheering. 

“Got him, Master!” Guillermo looked back at Nandor and smiled menacingly. 

“IS THAT FAMILIAR A FUCKING BELMONT?!” Carmilla exclaimed. 

The smile was wiped off of Guillermo’s face. The room went quiet. Suddenly everyone was looking at Guillermo and vampires from the New World that brought him along. His eyes darted back and forth between the camera crew and Nandor. He said nothing and bolted for the door. 

“No,’ Nandor sighed, “he’s just an ordinary human that took care of  _ your _ problem!” 

“ _ My _ problem?”

“Nice looking orgy! I suppose we could’ve been dropped off somewhere worse.” Trevor interrupted as he slipped out of the infinite corridor. Sypha followed. Cezar began growling at the two of them. 

“Whoever the hell is responsible for the corridor, take it with you and get the fuck out!” 

“Hey!” Sypha said squinting, as she noticed Laszlo’s hat attached to the corridor, before grabbing it and causing the corridor to close, “This is made from my people!” 

The hat was made from the skin of witches, or more specifically, speaker magicians. 

“Pardon you! That hat is mine!” Laszlo called out. He was still suspended in the air by a tentacle fuck creature. Nadja began pointing in Sypha’s direction and repeatedly shouting  _ “WITCH!” _ and mumbling unintelligible things about how no way in hell would she let her have any of Laszlo’s semen. 

“I don’t think so, colonizer!” she placed the hat on her head. She’d give it a proper burial later. Or use it to curse the idiot of her choosing. 

“Alucard?” Trevor looked over, seeing who he believed to be his friend, a complete mess on the floor, next to a broken vase and a puddle of vomit. Realizing his friends had unexpectedly shown up like this caused Alucard’s instincts to kick in. He quickly pulled himself together mentally and put his cold exterior back up. 

Sypha ran over to him and asked, “Are you ok?” 

Alucard smirked, “Ok? Trevor wishes he was having as much fun as I am. But I suggest the both of you get out. Heterosexuals aren’t welcome at these things and your monogamous selves would never fit in here.” 

“Just how many people have you fucked at this thing?” Trevor began to ask. 

Alucard laughed, “Do you remember how many breads you have eaten in your life?” 

Sypha smacked Trevor over the head. “It’s rude to ask something like that!” then she spoke to Alucard, “Who told you we were heterosexual and monogamous? I’m not.” 

“What made you think I was straight?” Trevor seemed a little confused and almost offended. 

“Look at yourself!” Alucard snapped. _How was that not obvious?_

“He has a point.” Sypha unenthusiastically agreed. 

“You miserable little pile of secrets. You’re really not straight?” 

“No.” Trevor said as if it should have been a long established fact. 

“Speaking of us not being set on monogamy,” Sypha changed the subject, “There was a conversation we wanted to have with you when we got back. We were going to ask if you’d like to make a triad with us.” 

“A what??” Alucard asked. His voice cracked. His exterior was beginning to crumble, he looked away to keep it hidden as best he could. 

“I told you he wouldn’t be up for it Sypha.” Trevor grumbled. Sypha brushed him off. 

“No…” Alucard said, “no… you’re cis-het-monos that never wanted a triad and left me alone to-” 

Sypha crouched down and gave him a hug, “I’m sorry we left you. I don’t know what happened with you, and you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but we’re taking you back home and you’re spending time with us.” 

Alucard pulled himself together, and smirked, “You don’t know what happened with me? So there’s something even the genius Sypha doesn’t know?” 

Trevor laughed, “Come on then, let’s get your coat and go-” 

“If you two really want me, prove it and carry me.” 

Trevor and Sypha rolled their eyes and shrugged before picking Alucard up together and carrying him out of the castle. 

When Lenore and Hector saw Alucard being carried out, she super-sped both of them to where he was. “Leaving so soon, Adrian?” Lenore politely asked, “Is everything alright?” 

“Forgive me,” he spoke back to her as she and Hector walked alongside them, “Thank you. I’ve had a lovely time, but I think it’s time to retire. I’ll mirror you.” he waved back at them. 

Lenore stopped dead in her tracks. Then she put a hand on Hector’s shoulder to stop him from running after them. It was important that they didn’t seem too desperate. 

Many other guests had already begun leaving. It was clear now that the party was over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm glad I finally got to this chapter, there were a few things in it I was planning from the beginning. 
> 
> I apologize for the excess of Jojo references... they kinda just happened once I decided Dio was coming out of the infinite corridor. 
> 
> Anyway I'm @tofudomination on twitter if you wanna say hi or see me complain about writers block and tweet random headcannons (18+ only please).


	8. The Next Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isaac attacks when the vampires least expect it.

The next afternoon, around 3pm or so, a time when most vampires were in a deep sleep, especially ones that had done drug blood the night before, Lenore was unpleasantly woken up by the sounds of fighting. Slightly hungover, she called out to Hector, hoping to have him bring her some vampiric hangover cure, only to realize he was nowhere to be found. She sighed in annoyance. He was probably up early again, like he usually was, so he could go outside and do whatever menial thing it was that humans did in the sunlight. She begrudgingly got out of bed to go get the cure herself, but as she wandered the halls the fighting got louder, and she realized Hector’s voice was buried in all that noise. When she sped to the source of the noise she found all of the fuck creatures slaughtering night creatures as they poured into the main parlor though some portal and Hector locked in a fist fight with another human, while a third human watched from the sidelines and ate popcorn.

Evidently the surplus of sexual fluids the fuck creatures fed on during the orgy overpowered them to the point that the invading night creatures were rendered useless. 

“Die you fucking traitor!” Issac shouted as he threw blows. 

“I told you I can explain!  _ They tricked me! _ ” Hector shouted as he defended himself and tried to hit back.

Miranda shoveled another handful of popcorn into her mouth. 

“Not even  _ you _ are that stupid!” Issac interrupted when Lenore rushed in to hold him back from hurting Hector, “Unhand me!” 

“I don’t know what my pet did to upset you,” Lenore said coldly, “But you will not discipline him in my place.”

Issac burst out laughing as he struggled against Lenore’s grip, “Her pet? So you sold out for coochie? Your own fuck creatures weren’t good enough?! Did Carmilla and the rest of Dracula's war council fuck you too?” 

“Excuse me.” Carmilla said as she appeared. “What the fuck is going on in here?” 

Miranda filled her in. “That one,” she pointed at Isaac, “is upset at that one,” she pointed at Hector, “and a whole lot of vampires for betraying Dracula. But she interrupted the whole thing,” she said referring to Lenore, “It’s a shame. It’s not often you see two forgemasters at each other’s throats. Even when you are a forgemaster. But you know how men are. Stupid.” she offered Carmilla some popcorn, “Want any?” 

“You’re a forgemaster?” Carmilla’s curiosity was piqued. 

“A woman  _ and _ a forgemaster?” Striga asked as she and Morana showed up “Interesting.” 

“Are you partial towards either of them?” Morana asked. 

“No,” Miranda responded, “Just enjoying the show.” 

They looked on as Hector sat on his knees and apologized to Issac and tried to explain himself, before Lenore told him to “let Mommy handle this,” and pointed out to Isaac that his army was wiped out and negotiations were his best bet while still holding him back. 

“What are your feelings towards humans?” Morana asked. 

Miranda shrugged, “Meh.” 

“Would you be against vampires subjugating humanity and raising them as livestock?”

Miranda shrugged again, “It’s not like it’s any worse than what humans do to animals.” 

They looked on as Lenore had Hector and Issac sit down at a round table. She gave them each a piece of paper, and told them to write down what they wanted to get out of the negotiations on it so they’d have a starting point. Hector wrote “I want to be friends again” and included a stick-figure drawing of Issac and himself smiling and holding hands. Isaac wrote “I want Hector and all of the vampires in Styria to suffer and die.” 

“What are your feelings about men?” Striga asked Miranda.

“They’re idiots. Am I going to be offered a job at the end of these questions?” Miranda asked. “Because I’m interested.” 

“One moment. We have a few things to discuss” Striga replied. The three members of the ruling council huddled and spoke quietly for a moment. 

Miranda looked on as the negotiations continued. 

“Let’s see Issac,” Lenore said, “You want Hector and all of the vampires in Styria to suffer and die. All of the vampires in Styria are already dead, and we’ve all suffered a great deal to get where we are, and I was already planning on turning Hector, so eventually he’ll be dead too.” 

“That isn’t what I meant and you know it.” Isaac cooly responded. 

“But the point still stands! And now, Hector’s written that he wants to be friends with Isaac again. Isaac are you willing to be friends with Hector again after he’s dead and you get what you want?” 

Miranda’s focus was broken when the three sisters turned back to her and asked if she’d like to work for them. She agreed, but she wanted her payment guaranteed. Likewise the ruling council wanted a guarantee of loyalty. Otherwise the three of them were thrilled they’d have a woman working for them. 

Carmilla interrupted her sister’s negotiations, “Lenore, we need you to draw up an employment contract with Miranda. We’re firing Hector.” 

“Firing me?” Hector said in surprise, “I never agreed to this! You  _ enslaved _ me!”

“I’m busy Carmilla,” Lenore ignored Hector, “can't it wait?” 

Carmilla rolled her eyes as she removed her ring and tossed it back to Lenore, “We’re about to become an empire ruled by four women with a woman forgemaster building our army, but some drama with your pet is more important?” 

Lenore was about to answer, when another portal opened up and a man fell out of it. 

“Not this shit again.” Carmilla said. 

The man got up, dusted himself off and walked over to the table. “There you are! Isaac?” 

“Another human? Whatever,” she took Lenore’s arm and dragged her off, “Come on, you’re working out a contract with my new woman forgemaster.” 

“Who are you?” Issac asked. 

“They call me Saint Germain. Anyway, I overheard everything. And I have some information that might interest you,” he presented Isaac with a modern day 3-inch binder, “Information about who’s really responsible for wronging your master, and much more.” 

Isaac stared at St. Germain intently for a moment, then he looked at the binder. It was white. Nothing was written on the cover. Isaac opened the binder. He flipped through the pages. There was a great deal of information about some entity called the “Konami Holdings Corporation.” It seemed they were responsible for resurrecting Dracula numerous times, until one day they just stopped. After that they decided they would rather devote their efforts to making a version of some children's game where you need to get the ball in the slot for adults where you lose money, because it made their shareholders happy. It also appeared that Isaac was not the only one that wanted to see Dracula resurrected again. There was a large loosely connected cult of people that were upset about what Konami did in this realm as well as others. 

“What is your motive for showing me this?” 

“The entity mentioned in this text is the reason I’ve been separated from someone very dear to me. And in all of my travels I’ve learned only a forgemaster has the power to take them down or make them do the right thing. Shall I lead the way to them?” he pulled a glowing stone out of his pocket. 

“Yes. I will join you and take down this.. Konami.” Isaac stood up and walked over to the portal Saint Germain had opened. Before entering, he looked back at Hector and said, “Don’t think I won’t be back for you when this is done. Have fun with whatever arrangement they _tricked_ you with.” Then he stepped into the portal with Saint Germain and it closed. 

Miranda and Lenore had ironed out all the details and just finished signing the employment-loyalty contract as this all happened. 

“Your play date is over so soon?” Lenore asked.

Hector buried his face in his hands. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this update took forever. It's been hard to stay motivated/inspired without getting much feedback on this. But the comments I have gotten on this give me life <3
> 
> I do have an ending planned btw. I just have no idea when I'll get to it... or if anyone is even still reading this lol.


	9. The Next Night

After the previous night’s orgy, and the afternoon’s invasion, the castle was an absolute disaster. Dildos and the corpses of night creatures littered the place. 

Having been disturbed once already the previous day, in addition to the prior night’s orgy, everyone woke up fairly late and mildly hungover the next night, except for the fuck creatures. The fuck creatures woke up feeling refreshed and invigorated because an orgy was exactly what they needed. Even after fighting off the invasion they still had energy to spare. 

Most of the cleanup was simple because of the protective spells that had been put in place. Even so, Carmilla refused to help on the grounds that her room had been sullied and insisted Lenore oversee the cleanup. Striga and Morana simultaneously thought the whole thing was hilarious and repulsive, but they sided with Carmilla. Lenore was left with no choice but to oversee the entire castle clean up. A minor inconvenience that was more than worth the look she got to see on Carmilla’s face. It wasn’t like she actually had to do any of the cleaning herself, she merely had to manage the castle staff, Hector, and the fuck creatures that were more than happy to help with the post-orgy post-invasion cleanup. 

While Carmilla got a bath, Striga and Morana amused themselves using dildos that were strewn about to play fetch with Cezar. Lenore was not faced with the tedious task of ridding the castle of passed out guests and the corpses of night creatures. She stood in front of the transmission mirror, while the fuck creatures and castle staff formed a line, each one holding as many passed out guests as they could carry. Lenore had to look at each guest, set the transmission mirror to their most likely place of origin, and have them thrown through. Night creature corpses were no good for forging or eating, so for now they were piled up outside in the snow, their destination to be decided upon later. 

Hector dragged a barely conscious yet flamboyantly dressed vampire with him on line, the name of which cannot be said due to copyright reasons. It wouldn’t have been so bad if the vampire didn’t keep trying to touch him inappropriately while muttering something that sounded like,  _ “I’m going to give you the choice I never had.”  _ Hector almost found himself wishing he was still in the clothing (if it even qualified to be called clothing) Lenore selected for him that was plastered in warnings. Now he could only nudge his hands away and begrudgingly bare the prodding until he got to the front of the line. 

Lenore took a quick look at Hector, then at the guest he was holding. She looked back to Hector and sweetly asked, “Has this one behaved inappropriately?” 

“Um..” Hector averted his gaze and felt heat rise to his face. It was enough for Lenore to know the answer was yes. As a result she focused her intent on the general vicinity of New Orleans. The particular alligator habitat that she landed on wasn’t terribly far from the well maintained estate he resided at. It was close enough. 

“Well then, let’s send Mr. Property of Anne Rice home.” Lenore took in a deep breath to calm herself before snatching the offending guest out of Hector’s arms and throwing him through the mirror and into the swamp herself. 

She dusted off her hands, “That takes care of that.” she looked over to Hector who was already getting ready to leave and find another guest to bring on line, “No.” she pointed to the ground next to her, “Sit down for a while.” 

Hector sighed. He did as he was told and sat at her feet. 

“Good boy,” she said as she gently patted his head before returning to work. Hector leaned in and rested his head against her leg. 

He became lost in thoughts about all of the things he wanted to ask her last night but never got the chance to. He wanted to ask why she said other vampires called their pets familiars when the two things were apparently completely different. He wanted to ask if the rings they wore were actually wedding rings, and if they’d been married this entire time. What was going to happen to him now that Carmilla said he was fired. And he wanted to ask what on Earth she was talking about when she said she planned on turning him, but only one thing was on his mind right now. He gently tugged on her skirt, hoping he could ask her this question now that the line had dwindled down. 

“What is it, pet?” 

“Do you think Adrian will mirror us soon?” he asked sheepishly, feeling himself blush. 

Lenore paused for a moment and smiled, then sent the few members of castle staff that were still on line on their way. “Leave the guests, I can handle this from here. Have some night creature corpses set aside for Morana’s composting experiments. You can leave the rest outside for now in case Carmilla comes up with an idea for them. Then resume standard cleaning. Thank you.”

When the staff was gone she replied to Hector, “Would you like to check up on Adrian?” 

“...yes.” Hector whispered, trying to hide his embarrassment. 

Lenore smiled and softly laughed to herself as she focused her intent on the mirror. They were both rendered speechless when the scene came into view. 

The mirror showed Adrian sleeping peacefully between the two humans he ran off with in his large canopy bed. He laid on his side, his face nuzzled in the crook of the speaker-magician’s shoulder while the arm of the Belmont rested securely on his waist. His hair spilled across the sheets, undulating like rivers of gold that sparkled in the moonlight. 

The vision was the manifestation of romantic love between three individuals in the purest sense. The two viewers found the scene so breathtaking that neither noticed the mess on the floor that included bottles of lube, an empty bottle of wine, beer bottles, a few bullet vibrators, a bong, used condoms, the hat that opened the infinite corridor in the first place, and a strap-on harness with the didlo still attached to it. 

“That should be us-” Hector brought a hand to cover his mouth as he realized he just said that thought out loud. 

“Indeed it should be,” she said with the slightest hint of discontent before snapping back into her cheery self, “Don’t worry. Have patience, these things take time.”

“How much time?” 

“Those humans can’t have more than another 60 years. We can make our move then, possibly earlier if-” 

“60 years? Won’t I be old or dead by then?? You said something about turning me… and now that Carmilla’s fired me… What did you mean by that? Do I even get a say in that?” 

“Silly,” Lenore laughed, “now that Carmilla doesn't need you to forge you're exclusively my pet! Pets don’t need to worry about things like that!” 

“This concerns the rest of my life, Lenore.” 

“You just need to be pretty and do as Mommy tells you.” She gave him a few head pats and tousled his hair. 

Hector furrowed his brows in worry, “Please-” 

“I’ll handle everything important. You stay pretty. Understand?”

Hector gave in and sighed, “Yes.” he said with a frown, then he looked up at her and asked one more question as he pointed to the finger on his left hand, “Can I ask if these are wedding rings?”

“So cute!” she pat his head again, “But we still have work to get back to.” she extended a hand to help him up, “Come on.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone that's kept up with this fic until now! I have one more chapter planned, but it may get split into two if it ends up being too long. 
> 
> Feedback is always appreciated!!
> 
> Btw if you ship Lenore & Hector, check out [@LenectorWeek](https://www.twitter.com/lenectorweek) on twitter for info on fan events (18+ only please)


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